In my continuing blog on hosting a Burns Supper I will now review the “Address to the Haggis.”

 Your Haggis has been piped to the table. The Piper and Chef have had their dram and it is now time for the traditional “Address to the Haggis.” You should have a knife and cloth at the table for your speaker to “dicht his knife” during the address

 Your honoured guest should hopefully have spent most of his sober time since Hogmanay learning the lines to this most famous poem. Now is his opportunity to avail your company of his wit and charm as he gives the address.

 Please advise your speaker to take his time; I have seen many “Burns Supper Addresses” ruined by a speaker who appears too desperate to get to his next dram.

 There are many interactions between the words and gestures when giving the address. The idea is for your company to be entertained whilst maintaining the dignity of the great Haggis. It is not my intention to provide a template for the address but would ask you to get your speaker to visit youtube.com and type in “address to the haggis” in the search button to get some ideas from past masters of this famous address.

 Yours aye,

 Tam O Shanter

When hosting your own Burns Supper at home there are certain problems that must be overcome. It is traditional for the haggis to be piped in to your dining room and be presented to your guests. At the head of the procession is obviously the piper, followed by the cook/chef carrying the haggis at head height on a silver platter, and finally, carrying a bottle of the best malt whisky, the guest chosen to address the haggis.

The procession should come from the kitchen and visit as many of the rooms in the house as possible before finally arriving at the dining table ready for the address. If you do not have a piper, all is not lost. Improvise. Get a bagpipe tune, Scotland the Brave for example, for your CD player and play it at loudly as your guests clap in time to the music as the haggis is paraded round the house. There is a good chance that you will not have a set of bagpipes at hand for your supper. A tip for you.

One of the funniest “set of bagpipes” that I have seen was one evening at the last orders bell in the Ring O Bells pub in Perth. One of my colleagues Simon, from across the border had been taking a bit of stick about being the only Sassenach in the bar. Just as we were leaving the bar Simon picked up a chair, placed the seat of the chair over his shoulder with the legs sticking into the air and using the back of the chair as his chanter he did a Da Da dadada dada in time to Scotland the Brave, up and down the bar. It was hilarious. Use Simon’s pipes at your Supper and give your guests a good laugh.

Click on Burns Supper Kit in the Links section to get a readymade music CD for your supper.

Yours aye,

Tam O Shanter

In this, the year of the 250th anniversary of the birth of Robert Burns, a remarkable 3,653 Burns Suppers were registered as being hosted worldwide. As you would imagine Scotland had the most with 1,376 but England, not that well known for their Burns or love of the Scots were a very close second with 1,295.

 The Burns influence appears to be alive and well with Suppers being held in Russia, Australia, Japan and Argentina to name but a few. It confirms that old Scottish saying that no matter where you travel in the world you will always find a Scotsman. It appears that more than one of these far flung Scots has a liking for Burns. I had the pleasure of attending a local school supper this year where the whole event was being screened via an internet link to a school in America. Alford to Alaska…can you believe it?

The traditional Burns Supper is a very formal affair and to be invited to one of the “old school” suppers is an honour indeed. You have to arrive early to get a good seat and your behaviour must be beyond reproach, not too much of the Famous Grouse, if an invite to the following years event is to be extended. This would certainly have been the case for those attending the Homecoming Burns Supper held in the Brig O’Doon Hotel in Alloway which was attended by First Minister Alex Salmond. Visit the Homecoming site to see some video clips of the event.

The home hosted Burns Supper is where the real fun is and the ones I like best. No formality here. Granda has been too long in the kitchen wi’ the Macallan and pipes the haggis roon the house then halfway doon the street. Uncle Jack loses the plot in his toast to the haggis and cuts himself whilst dichtin’ his knife. Wee Johnny steals the piper’s dram. Auld Mac gets fou on the sherry trifle and Auntie Elsie hits all the wrong notes in her operatic rendition of Ae Fond Kiss and heads for the toilet in a flood of tears. As the malt goes round the night drives on wi’ sangs an’ clatter.

The highlight for me, without doubt, is a well worked Tam O’ Shanter. This epic poem properly performed can turn a noisy rabble into a church congregation where all are caught in the spell of the tale. It unfortunately can also end in disaster when the “chosen one” has had too much ale to calm his nerves and falls over his chair just as he reaches Auld Alloway Kirk.

All good things must come to an end and after much singing and dancing the strains of Auld Lang Syne bring another year’s event to a close. It’s a pity that it is a year before we can have another Supper.

Follow my blog as I give you more insight into the home hosted Burns Supper.

Yours aye

Tam O’ Shanter