When hosting your own Burns Supper at home there are certain problems that must be overcome. It is traditional for the haggis to be piped in to your dining room and be presented to your guests. At the head of the procession is obviously the piper, followed by the cook/chef carrying the haggis at head height on a silver platter, and finally, carrying a bottle of the best malt whisky, the guest chosen to address the haggis.

The procession should come from the kitchen and visit as many of the rooms in the house as possible before finally arriving at the dining table ready for the address. If you do not have a piper, all is not lost. Improvise. Get a bagpipe tune, Scotland the Brave for example, for your CD player and play it at loudly as your guests clap in time to the music as the haggis is paraded round the house. There is a good chance that you will not have a set of bagpipes at hand for your supper. A tip for you.

One of the funniest “set of bagpipes” that I have seen was one evening at the last orders bell in the Ring O Bells pub in Perth. One of my colleagues Simon, from across the border had been taking a bit of stick about being the only Sassenach in the bar. Just as we were leaving the bar Simon picked up a chair, placed the seat of the chair over his shoulder with the legs sticking into the air and using the back of the chair as his chanter he did a Da Da dadada dada in time to Scotland the Brave, up and down the bar. It was hilarious. Use Simon’s pipes at your Supper and give your guests a good laugh.

Click on Burns Supper Kit in the Links section to get a readymade music CD for your supper.

Yours aye,

Tam O Shanter